


rest your heart with mine

by alexmanes



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Comfort No Hurt, Happy Ending for Kylex, M/M, Mentions of Alex's Disability, Talking About Romantic Feelings, Very Brief Mentions of Malex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-06 05:42:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18382127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexmanes/pseuds/alexmanes
Summary: During a road trip, Alex and Kyle settle for the first motel they find. Sharing a bed comes with the territory, but they wind up sharing much more than that.





	rest your heart with mine

**Author's Note:**

> Based on [this post](https://roswellprompts.tumblr.com/post/183959228893/kyle-and-alex-bed-sharing-after-a-long-night-of). Despite some backlash I've gotten for liking the ship, I'm still inspired to write Kylex and hope this will be the first of many fics to come. I just couldn't pass up on the idea of exploring how close they've gotten. The fic is technically _not_ canon divergent because for all we know, this is 100% what they're getting up to during 1x11 and I'm not at all in denial that my boys are missing tonight's episode. Nope, not at all.

Alex is _exhausted_. He’s the bone-deep, heavy-limbed sort of tired where you can barely stand on your own two feet and struggle to keep your eyes open. It’s the type of weariness where the soul would very much like to dislocate from the body, if only temporary, to find some semblance of peace elsewhere.

Bleary-eyed and slack-jawed, Alex wonders why he isn’t used to this yet. Spending the better part of a decade in the military should mean he can handle something as minor as a road trip across a few states. He shouldn’t be slumped over in the passenger seat while Kyle does most of the driving. It’s obvious that Kyle’s equally drained, but he manages to be coherent enough for the both of them. At least, enough to pull into the first motel they stumble across. On an empty, desolate stretch of highway, paradise comes in the form of a painfully bright neon sign promising vacant rooms for the taking. Beggars can’t be choosers, even if the cars taking up the lot look like they belong in a junkyard rather than the open road. Weeds grow through the cracks of cracked asphalt, and litter in the form of empty beer cans and cheap take-out containers decorate the path from their parking spot to the front office.

If Alex wasn’t so desperate for a place to put his weary head to rest, he might consider driving another hour or two until they find better lodgings. At it stands, however, he’s willing to risk life and limb for just about anywhere with a bed. As he’s come to learn over the course of their journey, the military doesn’t prepare you for this type of fatigue. Exhaustion can — and does — extend beyond anything physical, yet that’s not something taught between boot camp and the front lines. This road trip has taught Alex that a tired body goes hand in hand with a tired mind. At some point, it no longer becomes a life being lived, but instead survived. Endured. Tolerated.

Alex’s problem is that he is thoroughly spent on an emotional level, which is doing his body absolutely no favors. Being stuck in the car for most of the day hasn’t helped either, especially given his prosthetic and the tight confines he’s been subjected to. There’s nothing more he’d love than curling up under a blanket and letting the exhaustion of the day melt away, stretching out and finally getting a good night’s rest. Kyle’s promised they’ll take a few days to themselves before heading back to Roswell, so Alex is going to savor every moment he’s got. He deserves it after the week they’ve had running into dead-ends and chasing paper trails that lead them in never-ending circles.

Just as Alex’s eyes flutter shut, he feels the slightest brush of fingers against his left knee. Four, maybe five, months ago? He’d jolt at the touch and snap at Kyle. Now, though...well, he doesn’t exactly shy away. He lets Kyle give him a squeeze, rubbing up and down his thigh to make sure Alex is still with him. Alex manages to wipe the drowsiness from his eyes and spares a glance at Kyle, who flashes him a weary smile in response.

“I’m gonna go get us a room, okay?” Kyle says, though it sounds more like he’s asking for Alex's permission. Just barely raising his brows, Alex's challenging look encourages Kyle to be more assertive. “You should stay put. Make sure no one comes snooping around.”

Alex wants to point out that if he stays cooped up in the car any longer, he's at risk of passing out. Without Kyle there, he doesn't trust himself to keep his eyes open longer than a few minutes, but one of them has to go check in and Alex doesn't think he can muster up the energy. And given the fact there's an alien artifact hidden in the backseat, they can't afford to leave it unguarded. 

"Fine," Alex concedes, "but don't take too long — and remember to use your fake ID this time. We don't need a repeat of Fort Worth." 

"Come on, Manes. This isn't my first rodeo," Kyle lightly teases, but because Alex has karma on his side, Kyle spends a solid minute rummaging through his wallet and pockets before finally locating the ID card. Alex doesn't need to say 'I told you so' when his eye roll speaks volumes, but Kyle still mutters a quick, "Not another word."

"I didn't say anything," Alex points out, now grinning.

Kyle hops out of the driver's side with a huff of indignation, but doesn't do a very good job at hiding his matching grin. 

 

 

 

 

 

While Kyle unloads the last of their bags, Alex leans against the doorway to their motel room. He's taking in every one of its imperfections, such as the peeling wallpaper and defunct AC unit, to determine just how long he's willing to hunker down here. There are a dozen different reasons to consider asking for another room, but the single bed isn't one of them. There was once a time where Alex would insist on two separate rooms, but that was both rough on their wallets and admittedly unfair to Kyle. It eventually became one room with two separate beds, but that didn't last very long. Now Alex has no problem sharing a bed with Kyle. Maybe in more ways than one, if Alex is being honest.

Suddenly, there’s a hand on his shoulder and Alex feels Kyle settle behind him. At times like this, Alex marvels at how normal this has become. How Kyle’s presence is just another part of his daily routine at this point; has been for months now. Somewhere between rummaging through Project Shepherd files and knocking back beers at the cabin, something peculiar took root. It blossomed as Michael grew distant and devoted himself to a project that's going to take him away. It's what he wants, after all, and Alex knows it'd be selfish to keep Michael tied down to a planet that's not even his own. A struggling love slowly but surely withered away, all while another bloomed with the changing of the seasons and of the heart. Alex is convinced a future with Michael is impossible, but he wonders if a future with _Kyle_  might just be in the cards. Every lingering touch and wistful glance convinces him as much. 

"Everything okay?" Kyle asks, squeezing Alex's shoulder. 

Alex nods, finally stepping inside the room. "I'm just thinking about how good a shower sounds."

"Need help with that?" Kyle follows up, trailing right behind Alex.

Out of all their immediate friends, Kyle has to be the most worrisome of the bunch. Alex doesn't know if Kyle's still trying to right the wrongs committed ten years ago or innocently lending a hand, but Alex has learned not to pass up on his generosity. Sure, he has to remind Kyle every now and again that he's not so fragile, but there are times where he also needs to admit Kyle's help would be nice. It's especially useful when they're out on the road and come across places that are less than accessible to someone with Alex's disabilities. Unlike his cabin, there's no bench or rails in the shower — so really, Kyle already knows the answer before he even asks.

"If you want to see me naked," Alex replies, "all you have to do is ask."

Kyle's ensuing laughter is a testament to just how far they've come. Rather than balk at the implication, Kyle looks downright pleased by it. 

"As if I haven't already," Kyle retorts, playfully rolling his eyes. 

There is a very select group of people Alex feels comfortable showing his prosthetic to, and an even smaller group allowed to see him without it on. Ultimately, the group boils down to his private doctor, Michael, a few of his Air Force buddies, and Kyle. The latter's a new addition to the fold, but probably the only person who manages to look at Alex's prosthetic leg without making him feel like a charity case. Alex doesn't need anyone's pity; his disability doesn't define him nor does it somehow make him any less of a man. It's something most folks can't get through their head, probably because they want to pat themselves on the back for a job well done every time they fawn over Alex. Because apparently treating him with the respect he rightfully deserves with or without his amputation makes them a better person. Kyle gets that that's easily one of Alex's biggest pet peeves, though, and actively avoids succumbing to the tired tropes. 

Because Kyle was considerate enough to do his research and already knows plenty as a doctor, he's acutely aware of things most people — even those closest to Alex — just aren't. Kyle knows that Alex has to take showers at night rather than in the morning, because the warm water will make it damn near impossible to put his prosthetic on right away. He knows Alex can't elevate his leg for extended periods of time, because it could prevent his knee from pending properly or cause misalignment of his hips. He knows Alex needs to stretch before bed, because it keeps his muscles flexible and helps for a good night's rest. The list goes on and on, really, and Kyle does a great job of helping Alex when he needs it, but never without Alex's permission. That's what Alex is especially grateful for.

When Alex settles on the edge of the bed and gets to work on undressing himself, there's nothing close to sympathy in Kyle's gaze. As of late, Alex's noticed pity has given way to something akin to admiration, and it makes sense in a very 'Kyle' sort of way. Kyle never passes up on the opportunity to remind Alex of just how brave he is. Not for living his life, per say, but for piling countless other issues onto an already full plate. Taking on a legacy he doesn't want, handling the truth about aliens in spectacular fashion, allowing himself to get roped into countless extraterrestrial problems — it's _a lot_. Even Alex has to wonder how his life became so out of control and admits he might've bitten off more than he could chew. Then again, he's got Kyle now; it's a lot easier to handle everything with his best friend back by his side. 

"You're pretty quiet tonight," Kyle remarks, as observant as ever. "You sure you're good?"

"I'm fine," Alex promptly lies. "Just tired. It's been a long day."

"Yeah, I feel you," Kyle agrees. "We'll make the shower quick."

As Alex finishes undressing, he notices Kyle's eyes linger for a second too long. When Alex's pants pool around his ankles, Kyle's gaze falls with them. It's not the prosthetic that Kyle's focusing on, though. There's a glimmer of interest in his heated gaze as he takes in the sight of a half-naked Alex, clad in nothing more than briefs that are promptly following after his jeans. A year ago, maybe even two months ago, Alex would've shied away from the look. But now he's not so sensitive about Kyle's appreciative ogling, and he may or may not be guilty of eyeing Kyle up the numerous times he's seen him shirtless. Alex has eyes, after all, and knows an attractive man when he sees one. If that man happens to be his partner in crime, so be it. 

"Could you hand me my crutch?" Alex sighs, pointedly ignoring Kyle's wandering look. Not due to disinterest, by any means. Alex just loves watching Kyle's nervous habits kick into gear, watch him try his hardest not to get caught in the act. Clearing his throat is a very obvious attempt at maintaining composure, as is the way he fidgets from foot to foot while handing Alex what he needs. 

"Right," Kyle says. For good measure, he clears his throat again. "You'll need it for the — uh, the walk to the shower."

"That's the idea," Alex remarks, carefully removing the bulk of his prosthetic from its liner. "Unless you want to carry me there instead."

Because Kyle is  _Kyle_ , he doesn't hesitate to take Alex up on the offer. He carefully slides his arms under Alex and hoists him into his arms with surprising ease, and he looks awfully smug with himself when Alex tries protesting.

"I was kidding, Kyle! Aren't you tired?"

"Sure, but it's easier this way. You're not the only one who needs a shower."

"You expect the both of us to fit inside that bathtub?"

"That's the idea."

Against his better judgement, and only because he's too tired to argue any further, Alex relents. 

 

 

 

 

 

The shower turns out to be a lot less chaotic than Alex imagined. He was right to assume it'd be a tight squeeze, but Kyle's presence is considerably helpful. Without a rail or bench to accommodate Alex's leg, Kyle's the only thing standing between Alex and a fatal slip of his foot. Alex doesn't spend too much time focusing on Kyle's nakedness, but there's a good deal of skin on skin regardless. Between reaching for their different shampoo bottles and having to wrangle the bar of soap around, they're often brushing against one another. It's not something intentional or entirely foreign, yet it seems both men are on edge by the time they've finished washing up.

Now Alex carefully goes through his nightly stretches while Kyle watches on from the bed. It's part of their on-the-road routine; Alex props himself up against a nearby wall to stretch out his limbs and Kyle studies him, always ready to lend a hand if Alex needs it. Despite the shared shower, Alex assumes things are more or less on track for a well-earned, long overdue slumber. That is, until Kyle decides to make things a whole lot more complicated. 

"What are we?" Kyle blurts.

Alex always knew this conversation was bound to crop up. Sooner or later, one of them would have to call the other out on their behavior. He just didn't expect it to happen out of the blue, nor did he think Kyle would be the one bringing it up to begin with. Alex thought he'd see this coming from a mile away, or be the one to ask Kyle this very question when they weren't both on the verge of passing out. 

"Depends on who you ask," Alex cryptically replies. 

Kyle frowns over at Alex. "Who else is there to ask?"

"You," Alex counters. It's clearly not the answer Kyle expected, judging by his wide eyes and gaping mouth. "Don't act like this is all on me."

"But it is," Kyle insists. "Look, I'm..." He pauses to properly sit up, which Alex finds a little too distracting. Kyle's clad in nothing more than his boxers and Alex honestly wouldn't put it past Kyle to use his body to his advantage. "There's no easy way to say this, alright? I'm just not—"

"Gay?" Alex presumes, already preparing for the worst possible outcome. 

"On and off with another guy," Kyle corrects. He glares at Alex for good measure, because he should know better than jumping to conclusions. "If you and Michael Guerin are still a thing, I don't want to be the third wheel in your relationship drama. The last time I was up against an alien, he got the girl and I got kicked to the curb. I'm not looking for a repeat of that, especially not while I'm still trying to figure out what the hell is up with my sexuality.

"My feelings for you are real, Alex," he carefully adds. "Whatever this is between us, I'm willing to go all the way. I figure that much is obvious after tonight, but if you're not interested, you might as well let me know. We could just — I don't know, go back to being friends? It's better than leading each other on if there's someone like Guerin in the picture."

Truth be told, Alex isn't so sure where he and Michael stand. Last he checked, Maria was very much on Michael's radar and Michael was building himself a one-way ticket off the planet. For the second time that night, Alex silently wonders if there's even any chance at a future with Michael. And if there is, does he want to seize the opportunity? Is it worth the potential heartbreak and inevitable drama of it all? Kyle may be the safest option, but he isn't a consolation prize either. Alex would be lying if he said he hadn't thought about what a relationship with Kyle could be like. Given the legacy they've been forced to inherit and the time they've spent together, Alex thinks he might have more in common with Kyle than Michael when push comes to shove. There's a clear disconnect between Alex and Michael; a rift forming that's becoming more and more difficult to navigate. But with every day spent by Kyle's side, Alex finds an inexplicable need to pull him closer, to bring his walls crumbling down and give Kyle a chance to prove himself. 

Rather than say anything right away, Alex props himself up on his crutch and gradually makes his way to bed. The moment he eases himself down onto the mattress, Kyle's arms stretch forward and his hands gently grasp at Alex's hips, helping him settle into a comfortable position. Even in the middle of an uncomfortable conversation, he doesn't hesitate to step in as Alex's guiding force. In an otherwise turbulent world, it's as good as any other lifeline he'll get.

"Things with Guerin aren't going to work out," Alex finally admits, letting out a deep, unrestrained sigh. "I think it's high time I accept that. I mean, he's changed. We both have. I can't recreate whatever it is we had ten years ago and he's not going to get back the Alex he fell in love with."

Kyle doesn't answer right away. He takes a considerable amount of time studying Alex's tired expression, but mostly passes the tense silence by rubbing soothing circles into Alex's hips. Then, voice barely above a whisper, he asks, "What about the Alex _I_ fell in love with?"

Alex manages a weary smile. "He's not going anywhere, Kyle, but he _is_ going to pass out the moment his head hits the pillow."

There are still a million other things they've got left to discuss, many more pressing issues to address before this relationship can truly take off, but Alex's answer sits well enough with Kyle. For now, it's the beginning of what looks to be a bright future. 

"Then he should know I'm beat too," Kyle snorts, "and ready to follow his lead."

So together, they get ready for bed. Alex splays himself out on his stomach — his preferred position when he isn't in his own bed — and allows Kyle to cuddle up against him. One of Kyle's legs winds up sliding on top of Alex's left, then an arm slips around Alex's waist and tugs him as close as their bodies will allow. By the time they're properly settled in, it feels as if Kyle's half on top of Alex, who doesn't seem to care in the slightest. 

"You sure about this?" Kyle questions, cheek resting against Alex's shoulder.

"Positive," Alex agrees. Already, his voice is slurring with the heaviness of sleep he's put off for far too long. "How about you?"

Kyle presses a chaste kiss against Alex's skin in response, and Alex finally allows himself to sink into a deep, peaceful slumber.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this fic, feel free to drop a kudos or comment, but only if that's what you're into. If you prefer other methods, you can privately hug your phone/computer close to your chest and whisper, "Thank you." I promise I'll hear your kind words, sense your gratitude, and smile to myself. Find me at [alexmanes](https://alexmanes.tumblr.com) if you ever want to discuss Kylex!


End file.
